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Test Drive Meme

TEST DRIVE MEME: SEPTEMBER

Welcome to the Ryslig Test Drive Meme! Below are a few prompts to get you started, but you may make up any prompt you desire! Please take a look at the navigation page for rules, setting information, and links to reserves and apps. Have fun!

SCENARIO ONE

You wake up on the beach thoroughly drenched with your mouth full of sand. The salt water causes various cuts and scrapes on your skin to sting and the sand isn't helping. The air is slightly humid, ruining any feeling of refreshment you might have gotten from your dip in the ocean. There are lights in the distance but the unfriendly scent of gunpowder fills the air. If you're lucky, you're alone. If not, you might find yourself staring up into a pair of monstrous eyes or down the barrel of a local's shotgun.

SCENARIO TWO

So you've just arrived, and already some of the natives are trying to get on your good side with offers of food, shelter and other luxuries in return for hoping you don't eat them. They even have some helpful pamphlets to share with you. "How To Deal With Changes", "Alternatives to Human Flesh", "What to Expect When You're Expecting (to turn into a monster)" are all great pamphlets. There's even some detailing certain monsters, and the changes they go through. Some of these seem to have been passed down from one monster to the next.

Among these however, are some... not so helpful ones. "Bunnyipyips And You", "Axe Thief Axehounds," and "So you're becoming a Fur Bearing Trout" among others. Sometimes they have marks on them from previous people who had them saying they are lies, or pointing out good "jokes." Then there's the people who aren't happy to see you at all. Glares and silent, judging stares if you're lucky, torches and pitchforks attempting to drive you out of the town if you're not. You may need a friend to help you.

SCENARIO THREE

"Seek us out," the voice whispers in your head, and before you have time to question it you've found yourself in someplace entirely alien. Maybe it's the Fog God's ghostly town of Dyster, where exultant followers dance around bonfires and sing their praises to the skies above. Maybe it's the Fourth God's arcade, with small robots wheeling about amidst the lights and colors of old pinball machines. Only one thing is certain: you are not alone, in this sacred place.

SCENARIO FOUR

The time has come and you've found yourself becoming a monster. Is the change instant, or gradual? Are you familiar enough with monsters to know what's happening, or is it a complete shock? Feel free to pick any monster type for this prompt, but note that you may not get the same one in game.

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2

There's a blue woman reading - or rather, glaring - at the pamphlets in her metal hand. She's already recovered, for a set value of recovery; the prosthetics that still work have only the barest amount of functionality, while the rest of her enhancements are useless, unwanted ornaments on her body.

She seethes at the thought, and while she can't crush a person's throat anymore, she can at least crush the papers she's holding. It's not long before she marches towards someone, anyone, and points a finger in their direction.

"You."

Yes, you. Nebula steps forward and jabs a finger at one of the crumpled pamphlets in her hand, and says, "Explain this... fur fish to me."

Eat people?

[The wolf's brow tenses unmistakably, knitting up in confusion as his eyebrows twitch. It hadn't truly occurred to him, put into words, what sort of hunger that he had. But yes, that was it. The desire to sink his teeth into a person was real and not just some vague, unruly thought. That instinct he felt had words.]

I want to eat people. [The words are repeated, again, working through the thought, before he can actually hear the man's footsteps. Far too close, intense, for something actually so far away. His ears tip forward.]

{ He did take a second to be thankful that he had been gifted the robes he'd been slain in. Imagine, trying to deal with a cheeky stranger in not but his armor! It was going to be hard enough to retain much of a threatening aura as it was.

Kel'Thuzad allowed another laugh, this one exchanging its wetness for a more familiar sort of hollow cackle. }

Old man, how inconsiderate. I mean, you're entirely right but that's very, very rude to say, dear. You won't make any friends like that. Especially out of me.

{ With discomfort he made no effort masking, Kel'Thuzad pushed himself slowly to rest off of his hands to entirely his knees. Blinking up, (heaven above and hell below was blinking hard to remember to do!) finally the magician took measure of the Interloper. And what a curious being she was. For every would-be Champion that had crumbled under his might he couldn't say he had seen one quite like this! Like a human, but the colors were off. And the eyes... }

Let me know when you've found those manners of yours, and then I can tell you that I have no answers for you.

If it wasn't for all the other genuine weirdness around, he'd be tempted to complement her on her costume.

"Me?" Butter's clothes have mostly dried from the lake and he's managed to get a handle on what's happening, but still, he's on the edge of hysterical laughter. "Why not a fur fish? I almost got knocked down by a guy with antlers back there. I'd say hairy fish were the least of our problems."

[Boone watches his ears move, and frowns at him.]

Yeah, it's something. Don't go bolting over there, though. I know what the hunger does to people. Makes you lose reason.

[He's already lost his own far too many times.]

"It was after I got here. Unless---Look, let's not get hung up on technicalities. It's a portal gun, Waldo."

He turns to face Waldo, holding his hands about six inches apart and making serious eye contact.

"It's about yea big, it shoots green, glowing interdimensional portals. So If you see anyone shooting portals around, we'll---we'll take them out. You and me. What do you say?"

"Portal...gun." He does keep a straight face at least.

"You didn't happen to have a pair of springy shoes with you too?"

"If I see them, I'll try to get your gun back." Taking them out is a little too much to promise. Honestly, getting the gun back is a little too much, he thinks. But he needs to get back home.

"But if you get it, could you take me back to my world?"

Her dark eyes widen for a moment when he mentions antlers, but not for the reasons one might suspect. Inhuman beings are no surprise to her; she is one. But she can't help but wonder if those antlers are natural or something new.

"I have enough modifications to last a lifetime," she says, with a metallic tinniness to her naturally breathy voice. Nebula narrows her eyes, and with an increasing harshness to her tone, continues, "If someone tries to add fur, or fins, or anything else to my body, I'll rip that scalpel out of their hands and by the time I'm done with them nobody will know where the body they were born with ends and where their custom hair trot begins."

Trout. The word is trout. Though with the way she's crushing her pamphlets now may not be the best time to correct her.

Those are big words from somebody on his knees.

[Look, her joints may be full of grit and on the verge of malfunction, but she's still in better shape than this guy. But...ugh. She's in no condition for a fight right now and she's not going to make threats that she can't deliver on. Which means, as much as it pains her, she'll need to play nice for the time being. For a certain value of "nice".]

...but you should know that this isn't the first crash I've survived. You'll want my help.

[Well, she can't say with full confidence that this was a crash. It could be another magic trick courtesy a bloated celestial being like Quill's father. But crash is a working theory for now until she finds out what the hell's going on.]

i.

S-step back!

[A shrill voice yells out, with a shotgun he had obtained from a guard who's blood was splattered on his clothes. He's pointing the barrel at another guard with a pistol and a scowl that looks absolutely disgusted with this boy -- and the boy looks terrified to be holding that shotgun in the first place. In fact, he's so on edge that when the guard simply takes a step towards him he pulls the trigger, blasting the brains out of the guard in one bullet and sending more blood to stain his yellow shirt.

After that shot, he hears someone walk behind him and turns around, pointing the shotgun right at them.]

Y-y-you want some too, m..m-motherfucker?!

[He has no idea where he is and no idea how dangerous or safe the people here are so.. forgive him for being a little anxious.]

wildcard.

[ive been having writers block so just one prompt this time, sorry! feel free to think of your own though and ill follow suit!]

... You don't know what a photo is?

[SHE IS INSULTED. THIS IS HER ART. But no, really. She's used to the locals not really getting it, because the technology and culture level is like... beyond retro... but all the monsters are from other worlds, yeah? Shouldn't they at least get it?

Guess not. So she's gotta explain cameras to someone now, oh boy... okay she can totally simplify this. Totally.]

Pretty much, yeah. It's sort of complicated inside, but I guess the easiest way to explain it, uh.... [She turns the camera around, to point at the viewfinder.] You line this up with what you want to photograph, and the light flashes the image onto the paper that comes out of it.

[That's... simple enough, right...?]

{ He couldn't stifle another round of laughter. Quite the lip on this lady! He loved it. Too many polite people in the world, and never enough rude people willing to play ally. }

In my defense, I'm not used to having knees.

{ Agonizingly slow, maybe, but eventually Kel'Thuzad was on his feet. He swayed with the wind, looking tattered, thin, and distinctly like the next hard breeze would have him back on all fours. For now, though, he was up and further examining the peculiar stranger.

One would think, with skin like that, she would be of Archimonde's race, or maybe a troll? But she lacked the fine hair of the latter and the hooves and tendrils of the former. What he found much more interest, however, were her...}

Rather like you probably wouldn't know what to do with a fleshy pair of arms. Learning curves, Interloper. But a crash you say?

{ He twisted his torso about, expecting to see the remains of... Anything, really. But aside from a bit of smoke in the air, there was no evidence to find. }

I doubt a crash is the issue. I don't know about you but I've slipped between realms a few times in my day. I've a suspicion a rogue portal is to blame. At least for me.

[Rick, who's currently just splattered with sand and drool, stops in his tracks, raising his hands.]

Woah, hey... Morty, it's cool; It's---It's all good. I've got this. I've---

[He trails off, blearily peering between Morty and the surrounding carnage.]

Never mind. Looks like you've got this covered. Wow, y--you really went for it, Morty. Just went all out there.

[He shrugs and crouches down next to the second guard, taking his pistol and moving to go through his pockets.]

"What?"

Rick looks over his shoulder in case this guy was addressing somebody behind him, but nope. No, it's just the two of them hanging out in the ghost town.

He turns back to face the other ~~geezer~~ man, shooting him an accusatory glare.

"You're the one skulking through alleyways in a sinister cloak. I thought you were a local."

What? There's two of them They can definitely take them out, Waldo. Probably. In any case, that isn't exactly their biggest dilemma right now. He pauses, furrowing his brow as he considers Waldo's request.

"I---I mean I can take you back to Chicago, but---but what's it like there? If we go up to someone and start talking about the murderous fiah people, are they going to know what we're talking about?"

Help him out here. There's a lot of parallel worlds out there and a whole bunch of them have Chicagos.

"And no, springy shoes aren't really my thing... but if you're looking for a pair, I know a guy."

[When Morty realizes the man he just pointed at was his grandpa, he lowers the shotgun and looks at him silently for a few seconds, looking as though he could cry with relief.]

Grandpa Rick...

[But of course, that relief only lasts a second before he points at his grandfather with one of his hands accusingly, letting the shotgun slip out of his other hand into the sand.]

W-w-what the hell, Rick?! Where are we?! Where the hell have you been?!

[He's honestly not sure if he's glad that Rick was here.. on one hand he probably was the one that brought them here and knows where they are but on the other hand he's. Probably the one that brought them here. Without Morty's permission. And that ticks off his grandson quite a bit.]

I-I was almost killed back there! I had a gun right in my face a-and the only reason I didn't die was because the guard sneezed and dropped his shotgun a-and I took it and shot him before he could shoot me!

[It's a little horrifying how easier it's becoming to kill people the longer he is with Rick.. but at least he's not dead.]

Bavan? I don't remember it in my studies.

( A small village, then, one so small that it may not even be officially acknowledged. Could she really find help in a place so small? Or was it a city she simply didn't remember studying? She had no formal education, but Dany had done her best to teach herself about her homelands. The idea she didn't know one is disconcerting. )

And what is it you plan to show me in Bavan?

[He realizes then that he can't gesture, so he tosses his head.]

You'll want to move, then. Because a smell is coming from behind you.

[She doesn't seem particularly appetizing, but maybe that's because he's not hungry enough yet to eye monsters. But he is hungry enough that whatever is out there does make him salivate, hits his very keen nose and makes his stomach rumble.]

[And he hates that reaction. It's vile. But as it is right now, he can afford to be a little picky with his targets. If it's a kid, he can withdraw.]

I'm not that hungry.

[Yet, anyway. He can imagine how it might get worse, well up in him. This is a mild hunger, right now, and the idea of sinking the strangely distorted fangs in his mouth into a person isn't as repulsive as he sincerely wishes that it was. Somehow mauling and eating were separate entities in his head. Hunting and death aren't exactly the same as feeding off a person.]

[One could start arguing the philosophies of capitalism and war. But at least when you're a filthy profiteer you're still some variety of human.]

Let's go around him. Or kill him if we have to.

[He's not really ready to try out a person for a meal.]

You can leave the water?

What do you mean "that's later?"

[Questions and questions and more questions. He's not exactly refusing the help. He doesn't have the frame of reference to do that. Even if he demanded to be left alone, this thing could rush up on him as if he didn't count.]

[Is he infected with something? Like the thing that's stained and ruined his eyes? Something like Cipher's parasites? At this rate it wouldn't surprise him. It seems like the most obvious option, with this cagey game of vague answers.]

Well, part of Vandare is controlled by monsters. Meaning, you'll see a lot of them. Second, once the sun goes down I'll turn, too. Don't worry, I won't attack you. I'll still be able to talk to you like this. I'll just be... bigger. With fur and claws.

[Hopefully it doesn't alarm her too much.]

You've still got some time before your changes start. So don't worry about that yet.

Yeah. Might have to, but we can try to go around him first.

[Even if turning away from that scent makes something in him protest, he does it anyway.]

Came here looking for animals, not people.

[He hears a branch crack under the man's foot though, and then a quiet curse under his breath.]

He's headed this way. We should move.

{ How horrifying, it was like looking into a unibrowed mirror. Mortal flesh was so unflattering... But Kel'Thuzad wasted only a moment to examine this stranger before looking down over what of himself he could see. Something wrong with cloaks? }

Oh, no, I just. This is how I dress?

{ It sounded stupider aloud than it did in his head. Yeesh. }

Nevermind, I mean. You're not a local, then? You're the only other person here, aren't you? Why are you slipping about in. What is that, a labcoat?

"Still no less horrifying," he said, admittedly. Between the sensation of what was supposed to be legs now a massively long tail, and the tongue, and now fangs, it was all more than a bit overwhelming. Especially since he wasn't exactly walking, but...slithering. Ugh.

"Agreed," a nod. "Though when did you...ah, start realizing you must drink blood?"

So it's not a costume, and she's probably not one of the fae, those are technical modifications. Which is really cool, but she doesn't seem to be in the mood for comments.

"Nice thought, but I don't think they use scalpels. No one's talked about operations. Maybe nanobots. Or-" magic, but that's not the kind of thing you say to a stranger, even here. "-something else?"

"Are you, are you a surgeon?" He could totally see her doing that and it gives him pause for a moment. The idea of vindictive surgery is really disturbing, ok.

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Test Drive Meme

Nebula | Guardians of the Galaxy, post GotG2

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Morty Smith | Rick and Morty

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me: types too much lmao sorry! you're great btw!

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iii meant vandare not bavan pretend that's what i said lmao :')

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