graveyardsmash | TEST DRIVE MEME

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test drive

TEST DRIVE MEME

TEST DRIVE MEME: SEPTEMBER

Welcome to the Ryslig Test Drive Meme! Below are a few prompts to get you started, but you may make up any prompt you desire! Please take a look at the navigation page for rules, setting information, and links to reserves and apps. Have fun!

SCENARIO ONE

You wake up on the beach thoroughly drenched with your mouth full of sand. The salt water causes various cuts and scrapes on your skin to sting and the sand isn't helping. The air is slightly humid, ruining any feeling of refreshment you might have gotten from your dip in the ocean. There are lights in the distance but the unfriendly scent of gunpowder fills the air. If you're lucky, you're alone. If not, you might find yourself staring up into a pair of monstrous eyes or down the barrel of a local's shotgun.

SCENARIO TWO

So you've just arrived, and already SOME the natives are trying to get on your good side. Offers of food, shelter and other luxuries in return for hoping you don't eat them. They even have some helpful pamphlets to share with you. "How To Deal With Changes", "Alternatives to Human Flesh", "What to Expect When You're Expecting (to turn into a monster)" are all great pamphlets. There's even some detailing certain monsters, and the changes they go through. Some of these seem to have been passed down from one monster to the next.

Among these however, are some... not so helpful ones. "Bunnyipyips And You", "Axe Thief Axehounds," and "So you're becoming a Fur Bearing Trout" among others. Sometimes they have marks on them from previous people who had them saying they are lies, or pointing out good "jokes." Then there's the people who aren't happy to see you at all. Glares and silent, judging stares if you're lucky. Torches and pitchforks attempting to drive you out of the town if you're not. You may need a friend to help you.

SCENARIO THREE

"Seek us out," the voice whispers in your head, and before you have time to question it you've found yourself in someplace entirely alien. Maybe it's the Fog God's ghostly town of Dyster, where exultant followers dance around bonfires and sing their praises to the skies above. Maybe it's the Fourth God's arcade, with small robots wheeling about amidst the lights and colors of old pinball machines. Only one thing is certain: you are not alone, in this sacred place.

SCENARIO FOUR

The time has come and you've found yourself becoming a monster. Is the change instant, or gradual? Are you familiar enough with monsters to know what's happening, or is it a complete shock? NOTE: Feel free to pick any monster type for this prompt, but note that you may not get the same one in game.

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Scenario One

[Before his eyes even open, he was first sputtering on the salt and grit that made it to his mouth despite the mask. Once he does crack open aching eyeholes, the man finds himself staring down the barrel of a gun from upside down.]

Oh. Is this really happening? At least you set the scene for me Ms. Narrator.

[Excuse me?]

Shut your trap and don’t move!

Ha! Nice threat buddy, but wait your turn!

[Fourth wall breaking isn’t allowed, I’m not here.]

Oh okay, don’t mind me then. Go on and narrate how this guy’s looking at me funny since he doesn’t have the nuts to just shoot already!

[.... That is indeed what is happening and Deadpool should probably be wondering why those irritated scratches aren’t healing instantly.]

Wait what…?!? I call foul! What kind of sick and fucked up fantasy world did you pull me into?!

Scenario 4

[The fog comes in to do its worst like it does to so many others. Besides that the weather change, cracking and snapping does capture Deadpool’s attention.]

Oh really? Am I supposed to humor you with that?

[His shoulder blades snap as something ossifies on top of the bone before ripping out from under his skin with gushing rivulets of blood and through the suit. Fire opal that glows an angry red clinks and cracks into shapes that are vaguely wing or shield-like.]

Hey! This was my favorite su-phleguhh…!!!

[Much too fast, pathetic human teeth shatters into pieces as tusks grow out sideways from his mouth, tearing easily though the mask before he has time to pull it up. Tiny golden colored horns break through the top of his head and push against the fabric as well. And finally, ivory claws rip out from his nail beds while greasy and bristly black fur thinly grows all over the mercenary’s chest, the rest of his back, and on part of his infamously handsome face.

Eyyyy, this seems familiar almost to his not-so-inner nerd.]

...Hey you’re right it kind doe-th! Wait what….?

[He waddles a few steps around yanking at the fabric that covers the smoking hot ass under it.]

I thought I checked thid-th thing for weggies...!?! Schrew it.

[Tearing into said fabric, he pulls out a golden leonine tail.]

Oh! Well I’m diggin’ the referncshe now!!!

---

[OOC Note: Since this guy's more than infamous for 4th walling, please note if you would rather it be reigned in.]

[A petite woman suddenly bursts from the shadows, grabbing the gunman's wrist with one hand and elbowing him in the chest with her other arm, throwing him to the ground.]

Were you just going to stand there and talk to yourself with a gun pointed at you!?

Talking is actually a very effective distraction! I could be rude and say I didn't need your lovely help and would've handled it on my own, but a save is a save and you showed some nice moves~

[He brushes as much sand as he can off his suit, but it doesn't help much.] Oh sure, you got the authority to dictate the results of my every action too huh?

And I'll be taking that...!

[The man's gun is snatched, examined, and holstered.]

You from around here yourself? Course if you got dropped off by some fanboy or fangirl like I was, then I can't help you with that.

[...She's not sure if she trusts this guy with the gun, either, but he's obviously as lost as she is.]

Actually, no. I was on a plane ten minutes ago and I don't have a clue how I got here. He doesn't look like he would know, either.

[She gestures to the now disarmed gunman.]

[Disarmed and with a single quick butt from the gun, now KO'd because NPCs are useless once their purpose is finished.]

Hehe, they said it.

[... Attention back on the lady now.]

Going from being on a plane to waking up on a beach? I bet you wish this was all some fucked up acid trip or something! Or maybe knife-induced hallucination. I've had one of those once.

[How smooth.]

[Squint. She leans to the side to try and see around him. Was there someone else there? Because who else is he talking to if not her or the gunman?

Oh, God, he's talking to himself, isn't he? He's unstable and armed. This day just keeps getting better. Maybe she should keep him talking until someone else shows up.]

It'd be a little simpler to chalk it up to a bad dream, wouldn't it?

Probably. Does that mean you haven't tried to pinch yourself yet?

[Oh yes he's very deranged, but he totally still has some morals. Totally.]

Pain and I have a very intimate relationship, so don't ask me to check if this is a dream. But if it was, then only one of us would be real. But with all the mutants around back where I was, maybe I shouldn't be surprised by the idea of people being stuck in one big shared dream.

Or we could just be blocks of texts paired with tiny pictures considering there's no sound to speak of and- I'm rambling so what do you think~?

Edited 2016-09-19 18:31 (UTC)

Pinched myself? Of course I... [sheepishly] Okay, yeah, I kind of did.

[Grace barely has time to finish that sentence before he's off again. She's having a hard time figuring this guy out, and she doesn't like that one bit. She's usually good at reading people. This guy? Who the hell knows.

Of course, granted, he's wearing some kind of superhero wannabe getup that's covering his face and that makes things difficult. And she's still not happy that he has a gun.]

What do I think? I think I might be going a little crazy. I haven't had much sleep in the last few days and none of this is helping.

[At least the eyeholes on the mask are strangely good at emoting for the face under it.]

In my experience, there's nothing wrong with having a bit of crazy.

[Wink.]

[HOW IS HE DOING THAT]

You know, I wasn't going to say anything, but since you brought it up... I can't really say I'm surprised?

[If there's any suitably dramatic tension left after such a baffling exchange, it's possible that the sound of an amused little giggle might just have completely spoiled whatever pathetic vestiges that remained. A way off on the wet sand, some kind of snake creature is curled up, one elbow propped on what for the sake of avoiding an anthropological - or zoological? - argument will simply be called his lap.

The other hand is on one of the two katana he's wearing at his hip, but he hasn't made any move to pull it. As of yet, he's more holding it like an afterthought.]

You're pretty funny. Do you usually talk to yourself like that? [The poor man with the gun looks pretty conflicted, since he now has no idea if he should be pointing the gun on the - supposedly - harmless bastard who is right up close, or the actual monster who is further away.]

Don't move!

Well anything for all my fans in the audience!

[Which if that giggle is anything to by, means that includes the snake man, so have a wink. Then an idea sparks and suddenly the merc waves wildly in the direction where the man's back is turned.]

Holy cow what is that....?!?!? It's... it's hideous...!!!

[One would think that some of these locals would know better, but on the other hand, maybe monsters ganging up for another's defense is a thing. The human turns, before getting his dominant arm gets wrenched out of its socket as the gun is snatched; they only have enough time to scream into the sand as Deadpool aims it right back at them.]

And as you can see, I am way more awesome than everyone thought I was. NPCs are never that bright.

[He's not exactly moving in defense of the human either. Well, he had attacked the weird stranger, right? If he wasn't prepared to get killed, he shouldn't have done it.

He looks as if he's down for a moment too, whimpering over his twisted arm, so Souji lets go of his sword for the time being. He draws fast enough to get it again if this stranger himself turns out to be troublesome.]

I'm not sure I understand everything you're saying, but I'm glad to see you're adapting so well. You're probably going to need it in this place. [He sure sounds cheerful about it.]

Oh yeah, definitely. It's real shitty to be nerfed you know. In fact it would've been nice if I got my good looks back as a trade-off, but oh well.

[The naga sounds like a very kind sir indeed. So a possible briefing from such a nice sounding fellow seems more than welcome and totally not a trap. Besides now he's armed, so maybe that could count for something considering the no powers thing.]

Speaking of this place, what can you tell me about this dump?

[after suffering through his first fog, Jyushimatsu is none too ready to experience another one. but probably even worse than changing by yourself is watching others change in front of you. he can't tear his eyes away from the man as he sprouts horns and a tail, waiting to see what new kind of form would appear. it's like watching a train wreck.

also, who is he talking to?

finally, it seems like the transformation is over, and all Jyushimatsu has to say in response to it is] What's the reference?

[really? you just watched a grisly scene and that's what you're focusing on?]

[It probably helped that there was absolutely no screaming involved by the one changing. Grisly and BADASS.]

Ah thath's schute, you want to know what I think I look like... I'm gladth you athked!

[Should he react more to meeting new monsters? Nah this is monster land according to the bit by bit briefing.]

You old enou-ph and nerdy enou-ph to know whath Voltron is?

[that is pretty badass!]

Of course! Anyone who's anyone knows what Voltron is!

[Jyushimatsu is not in full monster mode yet. that's kind of a spoiler. so he just looks like a young man with leathery wings and fangs! also he's wearing house slippers outside? is that even comfortable?]

Then RAWR....!!! I'm the Black Lion shee?

[Actually people probably can't because where there's fur, the suit is still intact.]

...The narrator hath a fair point, you probably can't see. All the red would throw you off, but thath's so people can't see me bleed~!

Edited 2016-09-13 03:38 (UTC)

Oh, really? That's a good idea! I wonder if that's why Osomatsu-niisan wears red!

It wath either thath or going to the laundry every day to get ith out of your white shweatshirt and holy shith these teeth are annoying now. How long do you think it'll take me to stopth sounding like Shylvesther from Looney Tunesth?

[Probably a damned long while.]

Or maybe I can demand thath the fangirl who dragged me here make me be usthed to it NOW!!!

[Deadpool is just yelling a the sky, he is totally talking to no one. Totally.]

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TEST DRIVE MEME

Deadpool | 20th Century Fox's Deadpool

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