polterguy: (Default)
polterguy ([personal profile] polterguy) wrote in [community profile] graveyardsmash 2019-09-17 02:15 am (UTC)

Beetlejuice | (musical)

CW just for general awfulness.
[One: New Best Friends]

"Sand amirite?"

[Confronted with a bunch of gun-wielding locals, the scruffy guy in the weird suit only chuckles.]

"You can see me!"

[Chuckling gives way to great whooping, relieved laughs as he tries to kiss the nearest nearest human, stopping only to pat himself down frantically like he's just lost his keys.]

"We have heartbeat! Oh yeah! We got lungs we got intestines flopping around in there. I'M ALIVE! oh shit, everything hurts, I forgot pain hurts. HOUSTON! WE HAVE MANIFESTATION!"

[He probably doesn't need rescuing.]

[Two]

[Beetlejuice returns the townspeople's own glares with malevolent glowers as he sulks on a park bench. Turns out getting what you wanted for centuries can be a letdown. Not only does pain exist, apparently being visible means people will throw you in jail overnight at the slightest provocation.]

Mmm. What's that?

[He yanks a pamphlet away from the vendor, then grabs another and another and snarls.]

Like turning into a snake's some kind of trick. I was literally manifesting snakes in people's homes before you were even a gleam in your daddy's eye."

[Three: Dyster]

Now this is more like it.

[He strolls into the bonfire party, smiling and making finger guns at the revelers.]

Hey! What's shaking? Nice scene you got here.

[He's not alone in this sacred place, no. In fact now is the perfect time to get religion and yell at the sky.]

HEY! Foggy, Fog, lady-Fog God, Your Fogginess. Believe me, I am thrilled to be noticed by a goddess. Though I have to admit I'm kind of on the rebound here. Be gentle yeah?

[He snorts with laughter.]

Seriously, though. It was just a greencard marriage, it's all over now. Done. Seriously. You ever want to do a very special one on one worship sesh, I am there! Take me to church already!

[Four]

[There is a normal size rabbit hopping around the city, dodging cars and causing accidents. How did this happen? Also why does it look slightly moldy?]

Hey, psst. Hey. You gonna eat that?

[The rabbit rears up on its hind legs, wiggling its nose adorably.]

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