[The absolute last thing Eddie is expecting—although maybe he should have, because ka—is to hear Jake's voice yelling his name. He jerks, lifting his head from its pathetic rest on a patch of weeds, and wrenches open his eyes from where they're screwed shut.]

Jake? Jake, oh, thank Christ.

[He doesn't even really clock the whole antlers-hooves-and-tail bit. He's too busy flopping back down pathetically.]

Jake, I think I'm dying. Would you look at this?

[He holds up a hand, webbed fingers and all.] I'm turning into the Creature from the Black Lagoon.